Saturday, September 28, 2013

I don't know why I keep going back to this town.

I was up in Martinez today. Honestly I sort of hate this town. It's a barnacle on the ass of government. The city buildings are pretty swank. The town is not. Every single time I go there I tell myself I'm never going back. I think it started when the city spent almost 10 million bucks to make it so the town wouldn't flood in the winter. This was probably for about 300 feet of creek.  Along came some beavers who started building dams, and the whole thing became an international incident. The city wanted to remove them, but the batshit crazy residents had a hissy. It's a town of 35 thousand. Now there is a whole section of government dedicated to protecting something like four beavers. They had to hire a specialist from another state. They spent another 100 grand to make it so the beavers can stay. Who cares if the businesses flood because of them. You stupid capitilist. When all of your tourism board is dedicated to a couple of animals that don't even show up - you know the city is dysfunctional. I've never once seen a beaver.

It's half a prison town. Half a union town.The city's only function is to sue the refineries that reside there.  If it wasn't for the Italian Art Festival (which is really overselling the venue - barely art, or festival) I'd never go there. The food is mediocre. All the music wafting from the bars is on par with Jimmy Buffets Wasting Away in Margaritaville. The festivals consist of rummage sales. I've been there a handful of times and I always leave a ball of bitch.

This girl was really the best one. But you know this is a subliminal message from Shell Oil. See how we love nature? They have to do that so they get less sued.

It was cute these guys dressed the part. It's the first time I've seen that.


  1. Say what you will about Martinez, but they do get credit for inventing the martini. The first one I had tasted like lighter fluid, but I have a weakness for them now. Awesome photo of the mario brothers. Can I steal it for our blog? DF

  2. Ahhhhh. That's the secret. You have to be cross eyed on Martini's to enjoy that town.

    Steal away. Thanks for asking. ;)