Tuesday, March 29, 2011

What is a girl to do about man code?



This morning I woke up and my renter had sent me this image. Caption - they finally found a bill to stick his picture on.

We haven't' exactly been on friendly texting terms.

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I didn't grow up with any men. No brothers. No fathers. There was my Uncle, but he didn't even know how to BBQ. Which is like a man basic. If you can't even BBQ you are not a man. Google it.

My mom had boyfriends. They were just hangers on though. Temporaries. Not good role models.

Over time I've grown to really enjoy how men relate to each other. Simple. Direct. Except when it comes to conflict. There I've learned men can do anything they want. As long as you can hit each other, everything is forgiven.

This presents a problem. Obviously, men and women can't do this. And anyway - women don't really understand that shit. We don't hit each other. Men however still think - if I was an asshole to you and we are still talking, things must be okay.

I think Mr S. said something about a man statute of limitations.

So if you don't file a grievance by hitting them, it's like nothing ever happened. Which is great if you are a guy. Because you know most likely women are not going to hit you. Limiting your negative consequences. And sure.... a lot of women will yell. Who cares about that though. All men see is, the lips are moving but no sound comes out.

Why does any of this matter anyway? Well.. somehow I have to find a way to step back from a shit pile. I can't hit the guy. But, I think I'm running up against the statute of limitations, and he wont stop trying to be friends. No matter how much a of a wall he hits.

Normally I'm quite the runner. I've dropped people for much less than this. Yet I haven't dropped him. And I don't quite know why.

Maybe it's because his mom was mentally ill like mine. It is kind of a bond. You can't just talk to anyone about such things. Especially in unicorn ally. Where just being positive wishes everything away. Or you get the other emotion. Pity.

At this point is seems obvious I'm not getting rid of him. But, I should get to punch him. A guy punch. Maybe that would make me feel better and put this whole thing behind us.

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