Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Oh - Here go hell come.

If there is anything you need to know about me - it is that I hate doctors. Will do anything not to go. Even had the occasional thought of - I wonder how much of this pet antibiotic I need to take to get me up to a human dose. Which I know sounds crazy and I've never done. No! Never.

Doctors are fine people, but I spent way too much time in hospitals when I was young. Despite the fact that when I was young, we were poor - and poor people didn't see doctors. Unless you were going to die. And well.. I'm still scarred to this day.

Anyway. Today I had to make my semi annual visit to my primary. Who was running an hour and a half behind schedule.

The other thing you need to know about me is that I am not a patient person. Wait. You already know what about me. Don't you?

Double anyway. Two people in the waiting room pretty much flipped out. One flipped to another doctor. Which I would have done but couldn't this time.

Finally he came to see me. I'm pissed but think - he is way behind. And I'm prepared to be super quick because I'm pissed. And it's like three degrees outside/inside. All my fatty bits are effing cold! And it's 1:30 and I haven't eaten anything.

Oh... but it didn't go that way.

First five minutes he talked about his Christmas party. Where he served wine. So the second 5 minutes we talked wine. You know pleasantries. I think I'm home free. No.

Next 20 minutes we talked about him starting a new practice. Which must be why is was so behind. Finally at around 30mins in I quickly rush through my stuff. But he has this prescription laptop that takes 10 minutes to fill out a effing prescription.

After doing so, he tells me to be careful if I have to drive on the narcotic cough syrup he just prescribed, and that if I do drive and get in an accident - not to "freely admit" to being on said cough syrup. Which is of course why you put up with all this shit.

He is a really good doc, and if I was a random patient all this would sound crazy. He and I have sort of an unconventional relationship. What am I saying? I have an unconventional relationship with everyone I know really.

The whole thing just put a crater into my whole day. And that is irritating.


  1. Ugh, I'm with you on the doctor thing. I can't stand going to them, for so many reasons, especially the time wasting while having to wait for them to actually see you -- usually an hour or more after your scheduled appointment!! I wish they'd let us deduct $25 from their fee for every five minutes they make us wait beyond the original appointment time; maybe that would be incentive enough to stop wasting their patients' time. Guess what: my time is valuable too!!!

    That said: I do hope you'll feel better soon.

    Purple Magpie (formerly Miz Minka)

  2. I would just die if he got a twitter feed. If they can get food trucks to randomly show up on streets. Tweet where they are, and make a thriving business - my doctor can let people know how late he is running. I could have gone to the mall. Which is less than a mile away.

    Thanks for the well wishes. I blame vegas.

  3. Definitely love the new layout of the blog BTW.