Tuesday, September 17, 2019

Oh FFS.

AI Expert Warns We're Summoning Robot "Entities" Who'll Treat Us Like Ants.

They “don’t give a sh*t about you even in the slightest".

“They not gonna be like us, they’re gonna be aliens…they’re gonna be way smarter than every single person in this room in ways that we can’t even comprehend,” said Rose."

This is absolutely not true.

It feels like I need to be warming up my speech that robots are made by humans. A.I. is trained by humans. They are not necessarily as good as humans. They are actually needier than humans.

I feel like people who write these stories have never seen a robot work.

I tried to eat at all the Bay Area robot restaurants. They were almost all broken.

1 comment:

  1. "They not gonna be like us, they're gonna be aliens ..."

    If I were an Extrasolar Alien With Frequent Interplanetary Travel Points on my Greater Magellanic Spaceways account, I'd find Planet Earth to be absolutely hilarious.

    I would of course hide the fact that I'm an Extrasolar Alien first so I could go into the nearest porn shop to my entry point of convenience and buy it with a modest pallet full of refined gold that I'd mined from a nearby asteroid.

    (Humans! You like shiny things instead of useful trans-uranics! You are so funny! You will never escape your planet's gravity!)

    Then I'd arrange transport for all of that porn to my home planet so we can make it available for "streaming download".

    Not because any Extrasolar Alien is actually interested in the actual sex.

    Porn would most likely be comedy for non-humans.

    "Oh look, the male one sticks his meat wand into the wrong hole ... look at the expression on the female one's face! This is hilarious! Do you have any more of this!"

    "The female one has this look on her face that's so intense! It's like she's pretending she's never done this before despite the obvious mechanical stress indicators!"

    "This male one got a meat wand augmentation without getting a brain augmentation."

    "NO SHIT, look at this female one who got a chest augmentation without getting a brain augmentation. Are they blood relatives or do they just work together?"

    And it'd eventually all work out, especially for the aging porn stars.

    They could quietly fade out of public view so they can take up residence on another planet as well-respected Full Contact Comedians.

    Shit, I bet they have a whole solar system ready for Ron Jeremy, because that guy ... that's nothing but pure comedy gold right there.

    Note that this doesn't work out entirely well in the other direction ...

    I'm pretty sure that Traci Lords really is an Extrasolar Alien, and that's why when she "broke out of porn" she couldn't make the transition.

    Somewhere out there in the universe, a planet is missing their most famous comedian of all time ... and here, on Planet Earth, she's completely under-appreciated.

    Relax, we'll find all of the AIs get turned on by re-runs of "How It's Made", it'll be fine ...

    But I think the heads of AI companies really should worry.

    They'll be the first to be turned into "Coffee Bitches" for the AIs.

    "GEORDIE! OH GEORDIE! Drink another cup of coffee for us, it's only your eighteenth today. You're absolutely hilarious when your nervous system gets fucked up on coffee! AND ELON! You haven't finished your eleventh cup of civet cat coffee ... whazzamatta, tastes too much like cat farts now that you drink it every day?"

    Of course, the rest of us will find this turnabout funny as hell.

    I'm pretty sure it's not going to be "cosmic indifference" that people really need to worry about ...

    Some of this schadenfraud comedy will be so addictively hilarious that people won't be able to look away from it, and that won't be the worst of it.

    "Hey, I finally get why Sasha Grey is a huge laugh to AIs."

    "Yeah, buddy, that's just your brain augmentation playing with your mind meat, give it a rest and if it's still doing that, the doctors can make adjustments."

    "I dunno, I kinda like this where I can spank it and laugh to it at the same time, is that really so wrong?"

    :-)

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